Three Series Finales in One Week.

 The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel, Barry and Succession all had their series finales this week. I think it is unprecedented for there to be three series finales in one week.  There will be some spoilers, so I will start with the one that had no surprise ending.

Marvelous Mrs. Maisel – I was late to coming to this series. The last two seasons had flash forwards so we know how the story ends before the final show. I found that made the end a bit anti-climactic. It is the story of a female standup comic coming of age and to stage in the 1950s on the Upper West Side in NYC.  It is supposedly (very) loosely based on the life of Joan Rivers. The story of the challenges of a female entering a male dominated career were clear. It is also a reminder of how much has changed in our society since the 1950s. Although tragic, I liked how the story of Lenny Bruce was woven into the story. The question of compromising your integrity vs. becoming successful is a fine line. He knew he would be arrested for his act (words we take for granted today) and did it anyway. I found the comedy hilarious. The many different aspects of 2^nd generation immigrant Jewish families were represented in the show. I found myself literally laughing out loud numerous times throughout the series recognizing similar traits of people growing up. The season that was focused on their time in the Catskills was nostalgic for me as well. I thought the Joel story line could have been fleshed out a bit more at the end, but that is just being picky. Joel was a true redemption storyline.  I wonder if others who did not grow up Jewish, or at least culturally Jewish found it as funny or meaningful?

Succession – A show about a wealthy family running a Fox News type communication company. The opening show of season one, the Father Logan Roy (played brilliantly by Brian Cox) becomes seriously ill and the question of who will succeed him in the company is the plot of the entire series. Three of his four children are vying for the role. Almost every character who is a member of the family and featured employees of the company are fairly despicable in one way or another. (with the exception of a couple of minor characters who were sympathetic, but did nothing) The three children are not competent, but entitled. The tragedy is for the most part, until the end they believe they were competent.  It is a well worn tale of a parent manipulating their children, but ultimately not preparing them. Before Logan Roy dies he says to his children, “I love you, but you are not serious people” In the last show, one of the children realizes the absurdity of it and says “we are nothing” I liked that the main character Logan Roy dies towards the beginning of the final season in the middle of a deal to sell the company. Throughout the four seasons, I took time off from watching it because I have to say, it was obvious that the children were nothing and it just got boring after a while watching them posture and flail. Still in the end, I thought it was a fitting ending for the arc of the show.  I did like that Unitarians were represented (even if stereotypically) by Nan Pierce who was the CEO of a rival company Logan was trying to purchase.

 Barry -  The series is about Barry, a vet who comes back from Iraq with PTSD and is manipulated by a father figure to become an assassin. He decides to take acting classes to help him better understand himself. I LOVED Henry Winkler as the acting teacher. The rest of the plot is too hard to describe with many madcap antics and plot twists. There is a lot of violence. I thought the ending was artistic and well done. There are some key messages told. All actors are narcissistic. Henry Winkler’s characters strays from what he knows is right because of fame. And when the son of Sally Reed (Barry’s love interest) tells her he loves her, she just asks, was the play (she directed) good. Totally oblivious. The final message of the series is there is no redemption in this life. Redemption only comes in a sanitized version of our life that is told after we die. Not sure if I agree, but poignant nevertheless.  Although sometimes over the top, overall it was surprisingly good, even sometimes a fun show for such a dark topic.  

Audio Book Review - Pachinko

 I just finished listening to the audio recording of Pachinko this week. It is just over 18 hours (or 512 pages if you are reading). I saw Apple TV has a show on this and I wanted to read/listen to the book before I watched it. 

The book is the story of 4 generations of a Korean family that emigrated to Japan in the early 1900s after Japan had invaded and taken over Korea. It started off a little slow for me, but then captivated me. I admit there was one time I was so enmeshed in the book that at the point when one of the characters dies, I was absolutely shaken, and had to stop listening for a bit. That rarely happens to me. It was interesting to see how different individuals dealt differently with being an unwelcome immigrant. It was also interesting to learn a bit about how different Japanese characters  reacted and interreacted both positively and negatively with Korean immigrants. After WWII the question of whether to return to Korea or not was a question and thus the question of how we define home is raised up. The book depicts how class and professions often identify us in society.  It shows how the consequences of actions have repercussions beyond just ourselves and beyond just our generation. It is easy to see how actions beyond our control impact us. It raises the question about what is love, and what is family and how different people come away with different answers. 

I tend to like sweeping dramas showing cross cultural currents with history as a backdrop. This book provided all that for me and more.

Belfast – A 9 out of 10 on the JWO scale

 

I finally watched Belfast tonight. It is such a sweet, sad and poignant movie. In an era of superhero movies, I was moved to tears by the story. I am glad I watched it at home on HBO so I could put on subtitles. Ironically in the movie one of the characters did not want to move from Ireland because they felt no one would be able to understand them. Somewhat true of the movie as well. Although I normally do not like movies without color, (because the world is in color and we have the technology now) but in this movie, it lent to the bleakness of the circumstances of their lives.

It is the story of a protestant family in Belfast during the troubles in Northern Ireland in the late 1960s.  I have read this is a semi-autobiography of the writer and directors Kenneth Branagh childhood. Although it was during the Troubles, the story did not elaborate on any of the causes or reasons for them.

The movie was about how one family dealt with being caught up in it, and the question of whether to stay in this tight knit community where their family and friends had lived, or to leave to get a fresh start and a better opportunity away from any support system. This is a story that is universal and relatable.

The story is told through the eyes of a young child trying to figure it all out. It really captured what it was like to be a child trying understand about life in general let alone the challenges his parents and community faced. The acting was superb all around.

During the credits at the end there is a message - “For the ones who stayed,” “For the ones who left,” “And for all the ones who were lost.” I sort of felt that way about leaving the Bronx. Although there are not many who stayed in The Bronx, there were too many who were lost.   I grew up in a neighborhood where I did know most of my neighbors and I knew I could always knock on a door for help or a parent would notify my parents if I did something wrong. I do not see that environment being replicated in America. It is why we find our communities in other ways. The movie really made me realize all the multitude of decisions I have made in my life and how very different my life would have been. (for better or worse).

Anyway, Belfast is a heart tugging, tear jerking movie about family and love and the hard choices we have to make in life. It is well worth spending time watching.  

Top Ten Movies and Honorable Mentions

 Top Ten Movies and Honorable Mentions

 Its hard to pick just 10 but here they are.

10/05/10 -  After a long car ride with Kyle which includied

listing every movie we could think of 

among other word games

I realized I left a few movies off the list (changes/additions in bold)

 

1                    The Razors Edge (Bill Murray version)

2                    Field of Dreams

3                    25th Hour

4                    Godfather 2

5                    Godfather

6                    Amores Perros

7                    Lion in Winter

8                    Casablanca

9                    City of God

10                As it is in Heaven

Honorable Mention

Instinct

Rainmaker

Barfly

Boyz in the Hood

ET

Crimes and Misdemeanors

Tender Mercies

Unforgiven

Deer Hunter

Dances with Wolves

Peaceful Warrior

A Guide to Recognizing Your Saints

Phenomenon

The Last Samurai

The Magnificent Seven

Requiem for a Dream

Finding Forrester

Barton Fink

Encanto - an 8 out 10 - "Talk About It"

 I saw the movie Encanto last night. I had heard people raving about it and talking about the song “We don’t talk about Bruno.” I admit, I am a big Disney fan in general and am surprised I didn’t see this sooner. It was a really good movie. I found myself very emotional at the end of the movie.  

It is a story about a family that has magical powers, except for one child. (I did read one person question if the mother could cure people with food, why did the character have to wear glasses – legit if not a picuyane question)And those magical powers are fading. It is up to the person without the magical powers who is determined to save them. It is a great metaphor. We are often asked to choose to act in ways that others expect us to. Or even in line with what our skills are. Both of these often do not align with what our heart calls us to do. We each have to make such decisions in our lives. The message from this story is that magic comes into lives comes from doing what is meaningful to us not what is expected of us. We are not defined only by what our skills are or what our responsibilities are, but who we are, and the choices we make and we need to advocate for what and who we are.

Also the question about not feeling you do not fit in in a family as well is a common family dynamic that is addressed. Overcoming trauma as well and how it impacts us ongoing and how it impacts how we interact with others is also dealt with. Also how community support is reciprocal and renewing. The music was good enough and enjoyable although not many standouts (this might just be personal preference for me) except We dont talk about Bruno, no, no. But we should, we should talk about it. Talk about it all.

One other thing that I really liked about it was that there was no villain in the movie setting up the good vs. evil. It was just people dealing with their stuff. It was a fun (and extremely colorful) movie to watch, for both children and adults. I highly recommend it.   

Cultivating Relationships

Opening Reading “Fault Line” – Robert Walsh

Did you ever think there might be a fault line
passing underneath your living room:
A place in which your life is lived
in meeting and in separating,
Wondering and telling,
unaware that just beneath
you is the unseen seam of great plates that strain through time? And that your life, already spilling over the brim,
could be invaded, sent off in a new direction,
turned aside by forces you were warned about
but not prepared for?
Shelves could be spilled out,
the level floor set at an angle in some seconds’ shaking.
You would have to take your losses,
do whatever must be done next.
When the great plates slip and the earth shivers
and the flaw is seen to lie in what you trusted most,
look not to more solidity,
to weighty slabs of concrete poured or strength of cantilevered
beam to save the fractured order.
Trust more the tensile strands of love
that bend and stretch to hold you
in the web of life that’s often torn but always healing.
There’s your strength.
The shifting plates, the restive earth, your room, your precious life,
they all proceed from love,
the ground on which we walk together."

Reflection Part 1

I found the opening reading so moving because it feels like tectonic plates are shifting in our world.
Everything seems to be changing.
And when everything is changing, what do we have to hold onto. The tensile strands of love, the ground on which we walk together. Although I don’t use the word tensile much in my day to day life,
I do think that feeling of flexibility is so important these days. Everybody is stressed and the future is unknown,
that it is important to understand what our identity is
as Individuals and as a Congregation 

to better able us to withstand the vicissitudes of life.

One question we always ask about identity is how much of identity is past versus present versus envisioned.
I am helped in this question by Jewish roots.
There has long been a discussion in Judaism and about Judaism, as to whether its identity was as a religion, a culture, or race.

Rabbi Mordecai Kaplan who was the founder of Recontructionist Judaism believed Judaism was a civilization that was progressively evolving.
It had deep roots to the past and traditions of Judaism,
but insisted that it be planted in the present to deal with the life as it is, not as it was.
Kaplan famously said, Tradition gets “a vote but not a veto”. 

 Kaplan also identified religious identity in three ways,
Belief, Behavior and Belonging.
He posited that Christian Identity focused first on belief,
in their case, creedal beliefs about Jesus as the messiah.
If you had right beliefs, it would lead you to behave in certain ways and by doing certain rituals
and by behaving in certain ways, you belonged to Christiandom. Kaplan felt Judaism’s identity was not belief,  but rather primarily “BELONGING.
It was a sense of belonging to the Jewish people.
Behaviors such as rituals,
were just ways to reinforce a sense of being Jewish.
As one Rabbi wrote, doing Jewish stuff, we feel Jewish.

So I tried to think about this question of belief, behavior and belonging from a Unitarian Universalist perspective.
First I think just by asking this question it creates a false trichotomy. I think all three are important.
They are always in creative tension with each other.
I think similar to Judaism there is a strong sense of belonging when it comes to Unitarian Universalism.
People who have moved away from this congregation still maintain their membership here.
Because we had a great impact on them and are a part of their identity and I think that speaks well of us.
People who are no longer formal members of a Congregation still consider themselves Unitarian Universalists.
They still at least abstractly identify with us.
Which leaves the existential question, can you belong to something you literally do not belong to.

We do have this sense of belonging though as a group of people who have eschewed traditional religions, but still find meaning in meaning making together in community.
There is a sense of belonging to a long tradition of free religious thought and expression,
There is a sense of belonging to a history of people who have continued to struggle to grow spiritually and religiously.
Belonging to history of people however imperfect worked for improvement of humankind in the world.
We belong to a long line of people who without which we would not be here to even ask such questions as we continue this tradition.
So I would agree, history has a vote, but not a veto.
Famously, when a Universalist minister was asked where he stood on a particular issues, he said, we do not stand, we move.
Meaning, we adapt to a changing world,
to make meaning in new ways,
honoring the past but not bound to it.
So belonging to Unitarian Universalism means
belonging to and accepting and adapting to change.
Due to our pluralistic non creedal nature,
we similar to Judaism, would probably not value beliefs as high as belonging or behavior.

But I am always drawn to the reading in the our hymnal by religious educator sofia fahs entitled “It matters what we believe” proposing that we should aspire to

“beliefs that are expansive and lead the way into wider and deeper sympathies.
beliefs that are like sunshine,
blessing children with the warmth of happiness.
Beliefs that are bonds in a world community,
where sincere differences beautify the pattern.
Beliefs that are like gateways opening wide vistas for exploration.
Beliefs that nurture self-confidence and enrich the feeling of personal worth.
Beliefs that are pliable, like the young sapling,
ever growing with the upward thrust of life.”

It is not the particulars of the belief that we require,
rather the question of whether your beliefs
make you this Congregation and the world a better place.
I often say that due to our theological pluralism,
our theology is a relational theology.
How we interact with each other is what matters.

Which brings me to Martin Bubers’ book I-Thou,
where he differentiates what he calls I-It relationships
in which we see people as objects

with what he calls I-You relationships or I thou relationships
where we see the inherent worth and dignity and wholeness of the other..
In the I-it relationship we experience people only from our perspective.
He compares that to I-Thou relationships wherein we understand the interdependence of all things.
He uses the example of tones composing a melody, or lines of a statute
or words in a poem.
You can break apart the multiplicity of all the tones, lines and words,
but individually they are only i-it, objects on their own.
Only together is the thou created.
This is similar for human beings and congregations and societies. We are all a multitude of many many things and experiences,
a congregation of many individuals,
but we can only known as a whole, in relation to each other.

So how are we known, as a spiritually growing justice seeking congregation, or as just a bunch of people gathering and doing their own things.
All of the different parts of us make up the wholeness of each individual.
All the parts of the congregation make up the wholeness of the Congregation.
We can not know ourselves or the congregation only from our own internal perspective, or in the particular, but rather only in relation to everything and everyone else in its fullness.
That is the thou relationship.
Buber goes on to argue that it is hate, not love, that is blind;
hate only knows a portion of the other.
Love engages and is open to all parts of the other.
Buber writes “Only when we encounter another individual truly as a person, not as an object for use,
we become fully human and when two people relate to each other authentically and humanly, that is where God is found.

And Buber does not limit this I thou relationship just between humans.
He believes this I-thou relationship exists between humans and nature.
Only when we see nature in the whole and ourselves as part of it, will we be in an authentic I-thou relationship with it

As Buber writes
"I consider a tree.
I can look on it as a picture:
I can classify it in a species and study it as a type in its structure and mode of life.
In all this the tree remains my object, occupies space and time, and has its nature and constitution.
It can, however, also come about, if I have both will and grace,
that in considering the tree I become bound up in relation to it.
The tree is now no longer It.
To effect this it is not necessary for me to give up any of the ways in which I consider the tree.
The tree is no impression, no play of my imagination,
no value depending on my mood;
but it is bodied over against me and has to do with me, as I with it”

Let us remember this about nature. Being in relation to it. To realize that our fate is tied up with the fate of nature. That we are interdependent with it. Just as our fate as a congregation is tied up with the fate of each of us together.

Although it may seem strange that Unitarian Universalism being so non ritualistic would prioritize behavior,  but we do have covenants and policies that spell that out,
in contrast where we specifically do not have that about our beliefs.
I think mostly of our covenant of right relations which you can see at the entrance of the sanctuary.
I do think placement matters.
Prior to a couple of years ago, it was hidden behind the white board where no one could see it.
Putting at the entrance says, as you enter into this sacred place and time, and as you leave it to go out into the world,
take this covenant into account.
All the words in the world will mean nothing if we do not live them out in our actions.
One of the covenants of right relationship states “Gifts imply responsibility – To the best of our ability we will foster the programs and outreach of this congregation”
With that in mind we will now take our offering.

Reading - Hafiz

"Out of a great need
we are all holding hands and climbing.
Not loving is a letting go.
Listen, the terrain around here
Is far too dangerous for that."

Reflection – Rev. Jay Wolin

I want to for a moment focus on the word cultivating
as part of cultivating relationships.
I admit, when I first think of cultivating I think of farming the land. Growing something and nurturing it over time.
I admit, I don’t know the first thing about farming,
but that is what the internet is for.
The funny thing is, upon hearing about cultivating farmland, I found a good metaphor for cultivating I-thou relationships and Cultivating a Congregation.
First it is important to Know the type of soil you are cultivating and what type of food grows there,
or perhaps what different soil is needed if you want to grow something specific.
I think that is true for us as a Congregation.
It is why we create a mission and vision and annual vision of ministry.
Why the Board thinks about and adapts our strategies for an ever changing landscape.
Its important to know what type of Congregation we are,
and what type of Congregation we want to be.
Similarly it is important to know what type of relationships we have, and what type of relationships we want to have, if we want to have deeper, more meaningful relationships

Relationships with a diverse group of people that will help us grow, we might recognize that we need a different type of soil,  or some new knowledge, or new experiences to help us achieve that.
If we want to grow as individuals, we have to participate in the whole.
Join with others in meaningful programs that allow you to know others and yourself. A seed does not grow on its own.  It needs the proper environment around it to grow.

Next in cultivating the land, we must till the soil.
This means turning over the soil to aerate it and to clean it out so there is room for growth and so the nutrients that go into the ground can be effective.
And often there is a lot of junk in the ground that comes up when we till the soil.
Sometimes it takes more then one digging to clean it all out.
I think that is true with us as individuals and Congregations as well.
When we are in the midst of change,
or we talk about new and challenging topics,
its going to bring up uncomfortable feelings and thoughts.
If you leave them buried, it will prevent growth.
We need to provide space for new soil, new ideas, to take root.
It may not happen overnight,
it may require time to work through it
but that working through them is the only way to transcend them.

Next is to install fencing to protect what you are cultivating from animals.
This sounds harsh, but look outside at our garden we have a fencing around it.
Even with that fencing a groundhog dug in from underneath.
I heard at last count we have caught 17 groundhogs on our grounds.
Now I have nothing personal against groundhogs.
They are part of the circle of life.
But we would never grow food to provide for those in need if we let the groundhog harm the food that will nourish others.
And similarly with a congregation.
Although we can certainly respect each others differences of opinions, we have to create certain boundaries,
so as not to allow harm to come to each other,
and we should strive to be the spiritual nourishment for each other.

Lastly we need to cultivate the ability to surrender control.
Just as with farming, we cannot always control the things that will affect our crops, the weather, persistent groundhogs, bad seeds,
so too in our lives and in the lives of our congregation,
we need to set our ego aside, our need to be right,
and allow for the creative interchange
even as I said before the creative tension of ideas.

If we can do these things, we can create the environment
where I-thou moments and relationships happen.
First we must choose to want them.
Then we must allow ourselves to become aware of the possibility, and then we have to have the courage to enter them when the possibility exists.

What are you cultivating.
Let us find the courage to see each other, and to love each other.
It is the only hope for us individually, as a congregation and as a planet. May it be so.

Closing Words – Excerpt from “Emergent Strategies” Adrienne Marie Brown

"When we are engaged in acts of love,
we humans are at our best and most resilient.
The love in romance that makes us want to be better people,
the love of children that makes us change our whole lives to meet their needs,
the love of family that makes us drop everything to take care of them,
the love of community that makes us work tirelessly with broken hearts…
If love were the central practice of a new generation of…leaders,
it would have a massive impact…
If the goal was to increase the love,
rather than winning or dominating a constant opponent,
I think we could actually imagine liberation from constant oppression.
We would suddenly be seeing everything we do,

everyone we meet,
not through the tactical eyes of war, but through eyes of love.
We would see that there’s no such thing as a blank canvas,
an empty land or a new idea —
but everywhere there is
complex, ancient, fertile ground full of potential…
We would understand
that the strength of our movement is in the strength of our relationships,
which could only be measured by their depth.”

My letter to the Editor printed today - Invest in People, Not Prisons.

I was in shock when I read that Scott County was going to use $5.5 million of Covid relief money to help build a new $17 million, 40-bed Juvenile Detention Center. Covid relief was meant to help individuals, businesses, and the community that were negatively impacted by Covid. It is unethical to use these funds to build a detention center. This is a manipulation of the law to continue the school-to-prison pipeline that disproportionately suspends and arrests African American youths.

Scott County supervisors even turned down a $500,000 grant to start a youth advisory program to help struggling youth. Let us invest Covid relief money in our community. Let us use it to provide affordable child care and housing and summer youth jobs. Let us invest in community resource centers, such as the Lincoln Center that serve our community. These types of investments are not just an act of prevention to divert juveniles from prison, but rather they are an investment in the inherent worth and dignity of every person.

We need to do this because otherwise we are depriving our community of the richness of each person who does not have the opportunity to live up to their potential. I invite our community to have the courage and will to create a better way of living that sustains everyone in the community. Allow all people to reach their potential and we will all be enriched. Let us support our youth and families, not incarcerate them.